Cutting Loose: Why Women Who End Their Marriages Do So Well by Ashton Applewhite

By Ashton Applewhite

For girls considering divorce or in the event you have already divorced, Ashton Applewhite’s insightful e-book sheds mild on what to think about sooner than making the choice to finish your marriage, the best way to shield yourself—both financially and emotionally—and how a lot your lifestyles will change.

One out of each smooth marriages leads to divorce, and seventy five percentage of these divorces are initiated by way of other halves. writer Ashton Applewhite is this sort of ladies, having sued for divorce after enduring an unfulfilling ten-year marriage. Cutting Loose is an important source for ladies who are looking to depart their marriage yet worry the consequences.

Shattering the media-generated snapshot of the lonely, disadvantaged and financially strapped divorcee, Applewhite presents a miles wanted fact payment. Cutting Loose introduces 50 ladies, various in age, race, type and drawback, who've thrived after starting up their very own divorces. Their fears of monetary, emotional and romantic spoil have been by no means learned; to the contrary, their lives greater immeasurably, and their vanity soared.

Cutting Loose additionally solutions the an important questions: How do you eventually choose to make the large holiday? what's getting divorced quite like? What are the shortcomings of the criminal technique? What approximately custody and baby aid? monetary and emotional survival? and the way does a woman's self-image swap in the course of and after divorce?

"Ending any form of oppression takes trust in self. Cutting Loose bargains relocating facts of ways such trust works, no matter if in a dating or jogging the line by myself. Perceptive, life like, and clever, the ebook is of huge functional price to either men and women who aspire to extra equivalent and pleasant relationships."—Laura Day, writer of Practical Intuition


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Additional info for Cutting Loose: Why Women Who End Their Marriages Do So Well

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BENDING OVER BACKWARDS One way women attempt to overcome their guilt at wanting out is by trying in every way imaginable to keep their marriages together. Efforts range from enduring abuse to attempting endless reconciliations, from dieting to putting up $30,000 worth of designer wallpaper on the walls of a new house. “That was $30,000 that I could have used,” sighs Keiko, a real-estate agent in Seattle, knowing how ridiculous it sounds, “but it was a gesture of commitment. ” Theresa, a Hard Choices / 35 nurse from Naples, Florida, went to a homeopath for herbs that were supposed to increase her sex drive, until “I realized I’d rather screw a doorknob than this guy,” recalls Theresa, her green eyes shining with laughter at the absurdity of the mission.

Their use can be both a symptom and a cause of problems, and even moderate use can cause trouble. Substance abuse can worsen preexisting problems, leading to estrangement between spouses who partake and spouses who don’t, to financial irresponsibility, and to violence. Alcohol and Other Substance Abuse Part of the difficulty in dealing with a spouse who drinks is that not everyone who drinks is an alcoholic. Drinking may also be paired with other substance abuse, and separating out the issues can be challenging.

A nice paradox was that in the process of becoming self-reliant, some women learned whom they could rely on. Sometimes support came from an unlikely source. One woman found that a sister-in-law was the only family member who genuinely sympathized. Another called on two childhood friends rather than on her family, who felt rebuffed that she didn’t want to move back home at age forty-two. Beverley, married to a minister, ended up estranged from the community she had grown up in but found herself a new church with a great women’s ministry.

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